I am the child of two wars fought by my Dad, the horror of WWII and the South Pacific as a Marine who suffered unbelievable trauma that wounded his body and his mind. And then for him to volunteer to go to North Korea and suffer again, and be wounded again. I was his first child (the one that lived), and knew him to be moody and unpredictable. Learning all that he went through now helps me to understand that my genes are also part of his. And part of my Mother who also suffered trauma. She became pregnant by my Dad. He shipped out to the South Pacific and she was left pregnant and rejected by her family. She was placed in a laundry for pregnant girls. My Grandmother from Arkansas found out and went to Virginia and brought her home to live in her new family, the Elrod's.
My Mom lost the baby. He was born stillborn. She believed the baby died because she had sinned. She carried this sin, this pain with her for her entire life. She never felt that she was worthy. Our life was chaotic to say the least, Mom ended up with me, and then four boys came along. All of us parented by wounded people who felt immense pain.
I have delved into all of who we are and me, of course, and now my children who have been raised by me with my wounds. I married a lovely man who never felt loved by his parents. So we both ended up with painful wounds inside of us and then had our own children. I now see why we all need to understand who we are and find the opportunity to grow from this and use it to our benefit. And learn to share this with our new generation of children and use all this trauma to make us strong, kind and loving.
The new Grandfather that we recently just lost. He also was a wounded child but overcame it and it made him a much loved human being. I am sure that his new children and grandchildren will be strong, kind and loving.
How Trauma and Resilience Cross Generations
Rachel Yehuda
How Trauma and Resilience Cross Generations
The
new field of epigenetics sees that genes can be turned on and off and
expressed differently through changes in environment and behavior.
Rachel Yehuda is a pioneer in understanding how the effects of stress
and trauma can transmit biologically, beyond cataclysmic events, to the
next generation. She has studied the children of Holocaust survivors and
of pregnant women who survived the 9/11 attacks. But her science is a
form of power for flourishing beyond the traumas large and small that
mark each of our lives and those of our families and communities.
How Trauma and Resilience Cross Generations
